Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Dear Maid of Stress

J.R. answers letters that aren't really addressed to him

Dear Maid of Stress,

I saw Dear Prudence' response to your letter. Prudence got it wrong, and I'm writing you so you can do right by your friend at her wedding.

So your friend wants to have a cartoon-themed wedding and has asked you to be in the cartoon-themed wedding party. Take it as a compliment, get over yourself and help your friend enjoy her day.

Your friend obviously believes that you can lighten up and have a good time. I think you're an old fuddy-duddy who wouldn't know a good time if it hit her on the head with an anvil. So prove her right and prove me wrong by getting out there and partying down as Daffy Duck – a character who, like you, is funny because he takes himself too seriously.

To prepare yourself for this assignment, you need to watch the Chuck Jones classic cartoon Duck Amuck.

In short: It's your friend's wedding day, not yours. Get that stick out of your ass and use it to conduct the orchestra for her.

Signed,
   J.R.

P.S. Send me photos of the wedding. It sounds like it's going to be a blast.

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